As My World Turns

The past few weeks have been amazing to me. I continue to marvel at how the world turns to bring around surprises into my life in which I can see the divine hand in it all, and view in awe the ways God is sending his grace gifts my way.

This all started with an email to me from my minister at Social Circle United Methodist Church a few weeks ago asking me if I’d be interested in a job opening in the church’s district office. Our district superintendent had sent out a notice to all of his pastors asking for recommendations for an administrative assistant at his office. Since Richard, our pastor, knew that I have been officially unemployed for the past year-and-a-half, he contacted me to see if I’d be interested. My response to him --- as long as it doesn’t involve a daily commute to Atlanta, I’d like to hear more about it.

Lo and behold, Richard sent me the name and email of our District Superintendent – Dr. Gary Whetstone! There could only be one Gary Whetstone in the world, and that would have to be the big brother of Pam and Mona, who were members of the youth group at New Hope United Methodist Church, David’s student appointment when he was in theology school back in the 70s. Being a fringe member of our church, and not actively involved beyond my weekly knitting group, our Relay for Life team, and early service on Sunday, I didn’t even know who our DS was! I typed up a quick email to Dr. Whetstone, with my resume as an attachment. I told him that I wasn’t sure if I was qualified for the position, but I sure would love to know about Pam and Mona, as well as news about his parents.

I think Gary invited me to Athens for an interview as a courtesy, since I had a history with his family. It was a lovely interview, and I enjoyed meeting with Gary and his search committee. I knew, however, on the way home from the interview that this particular job was not the one for me, and definitely didn’t have my name on it. I faced the fact that I really didn’t want to become close to the policies and politics of the church again, and while I felt that I would enjoy working with Gary, I knew that this wouldn’t be a career choice for me at this point in my life.

However, it opened the door for me to make contact with Pam through Facebook, which led to a lunch with her last week in Blue Ridge, when Phil and I were returning home from seeing Brian at his play’s premiere in Kentucky. Seeing Pam was like having a burst of fresh air on my face, and the years faded away as we visited over lunch with her mother, Lu, at a little Chinese restaurant in Blue Ridge. Pam encouraged me to contact other New Hope youth group members who were also on Facebook, and after returning home, I did just that.

I am now Facebook friends with several of our youth group from those three years we were at New Hope. I love Facebook! It has brought me, after so many years, back to people whose lives touched mine while I lived the life of a minister’s wife, and has renewed my faith in Christian love and the incredible ways God can reach across decades and the internet to bring me back into the loving arms of those people I knew in the churches we served. It has been a year of Facebook surprises. First, it was a reunion between me and friends from Fieldale United Methodist Church in Virginia, and now with these great “kids” from New Hope. If it weren’t for Facebook and my local minister, none of this would have happened.

All of this also led to another revelation. While driving to Lincolnton this week to have lunch with a friend, my mind was wandering over the past 18 years since I first met her as my academic advisor and professor at library school. I realized that I have been an ex-minister’s wife longer than I was a minister’s wife. Those years, however, had a dramatic impact on me, and were instrumental in designing who I am today. With writing my novel this past year about a minister’s wife, and then reuniting with former church friends, a lot of memories – some of them buried very deep – have bubbled to the surface, and I can examine them with fresh eyes and attitude. I can also shed my ex-preacher’s wife cloak and simply be an old friend to laugh and cry over special memories and share in what’s happening today in all of our lives.

As I collect the days of my life, these recent days have certainly been worthy of noting in my Collection of Days. And I want to take this medium to thank those people who are now connected to me through Facebook and through my blog to say “thank you” for loving me and standing beside me, for reaching out to me, and for being my friends. For so many years I lived in the shadow of my ex-husband, who was adored by his congregations, not realizing that I could be loved apart from him as an individual in my own right. It took a bit of time for me to lose the feeling of invisibility, and I am thankful that God is patient and kind, and has blessed me by bringing so many special people back into my life.

But before I give Facebook all of the credit, I cannot end this Day without a mention of two special friends who have kept up with me since pre-Facebook days. My two friends in Virginia, Jane and Norma, are my angels who have lifted me up on their wings ever since the day my marriage ended. They never judged, they never questioned, they always loved, and they have been a constant in my life since the day I moved out of the parsonage so many years ago. And I also want to thank Wade, Brian, and Roy for encouraging me to sign up on Facebook, because it is through them that many of these wonderful connections have been made.

Wonder what the next surprise will be….. Stay posted!

Breaking Up is Hard to Do

They say that when you break up after a long relationship, you shouldn’t jump right into another one. They also warn against dumping a lover or partner for a new one. “They’ve” also been telling me for months, “Jennie, you have to get a new washing machine and dryer.”

I have had a 17-year relationship with my faithful Kenmore washer and dryer. We’ve been on intimate terms since BP (Before Phil). I knew two years ago that our relationship was on the skids, but I persevered, and my washer and dryer kept on chugging along, always loyal, but beginning to make funny noises of complaint. I love my washer and dryer. Both have lived through abuse, neglect, over-loading, and being moved from place to place, never skipping a beat in their performance. I always knew I could count on them, and they never disappointed me. Until recently.

I first noticed the struggling sounds my washing machine was making about a year ago, and it wasn’t spinning the water out of the clothes the way it had in its younger days. And my dryer began leaving me little messages on my clothes, telling me that the drum was beginning to rust. I ignored them as much as possible; yet, on the sly I began doing internet research on new models. Feeling guilty, I couldn’t let them know that I was contemplating replacing them for newer “trophy” models.

Two weeks ago, when I had to turn up the volume on the tv in the living room to drown out the noise in the laundry room on the other side of the house, I knew action was required. I worked up my courage, sneaked out of the house, and drove to the nearest Sears store. A very nice and friendly salesman, Nick, was sent to me by the washing machine gods that day. I told him what I had, and what I thought I wanted in a new washer-dryer set. He showed me everything on the sales floor that came close to my list of requirements without making a single recommendation. He then let me ask questions, and answered them professionally and honestly. (I slipped in a few trick questions to make sure he was on the up-and-up). I finally decided on a Maytag set, with visions of the lonely Maytag repairman in my mind, and the deal was done.

Five days later, Nick and his co-worker, Charlie, appeared at our door with two huge boxes, ready to install my new washer and dryer. I watched as they unplugged and unhooked my old set, almost breaking into tears as I watched them roll them out of my home. An hour later, my new Maytags were ready to use, and my laundry room sparkled. As I washed my first load, I had to keep checking on the washing machine to make sure it was working. It was quiet!! The same with the dryer – I had become so accustomed to the clanking and grinding of the old ones, I was amazed at the near silent whirs and whispers that emitted from the new Maytags.

Even though I am pleased so far with my new set, I miss my old Kenmores. They are still with us, sitting in our carport, waiting to be taken to laundry room heaven. Whenever I pass them on the way to my car or to the garden, I pause to touch them and thank them for all they did for me. I also tell them I’m sorry I had to replace them! Seventeen years is a long, long time, and they never let me down.

Yes, breaking up is hard to do!