Mourning the End of Summer

The days are getting shorter. I’ve noticed it both in the mornings and evenings. All summer long I was out in my garden at 7:00 AM picking vegetables, weeding, and making sure no deer or other critters had made a salad bar visit during the night. And, in the evenings, Diamond and I would go for our long walks in sunshine and long shadows.

At 7:00 this morning it was still dark, with only the hint of the new day in the eastern sky. Last night Diamond and I got caught in twilight as we finished up our walk after dinner. I’ve decided that I am a sunshine kind of girl, and in voicing this fact, realize that I am mourning the end of summer. I tell myself that it won’t be long until Spring will be here again. But then I also remind myself that I have to make it through the long nights of winter. My one redeeming thought is that of hibernation, because it is in the winter that I nest down in my cozy home and feel the security and warm hugs of the walls around me.

With Autumn come cool, breezy days and bright blue skies, which I love, but they signal to me the end of another life cycle, that I find kind of sad. I can remember a childhood Sunday School teacher talking about the promise of new life as she showed us the seeds of summer flowers and vegetables. Even though this promise was reassuring, I had experienced the death of a brother and grandfather and beloved aunts and uncles, and I knew that no seed was left from their lives to bring them back the following April or May.

Fall reminds me of my mortality and the seasons of my own life. It also makes me begin to think about what is beyond Fall and Winter for me. I have been engaged in many conversations of the theories of whether there is something for us beyond the grave, and have heard many theories and promises on this subject. None of us know what welcomes us as our own life seasons come to an end. For myself, I have formed my own theory which is totally unscientific and not purely religious. As I told a friend one day when this topic came up, “I believe that there is something beyond this life because it is impossible for me not to believe it.” Not a logical statement, but it is the only one that I have, and I’m sticking to it!

I also look at the universe as I broach this topic in my mind. As I see specials on television about the universe and the theories of its creation, I always come back to one question, “What about origin?” I don’t have the answer, and the question goes unanswered for me by the scientific world. My one conclusion always comes back to God and a feeling that I will one day have the privilege of exploring the universe after leaving this world. There is so much out there to see!

But back to the thought of summer coming to an end. I don’t like it, and I am watching the sun and noting how its position in the sky is changing as my world readies itself for winter. I am already looking forward to the first warm and sunny day next Spring!